This is blatantly stolen from another board but the general board needs some discussion. Here's one of mine:

So I worked at a summer camp 3 years during college. So basically I started at the same time as this other guy and this girl. The one guy had a horrible attitude in general and was just lazy and there were always problems with the kids he had because he couldn't control them.

So every offseason he'd get it in his head that he was going to get promoted to be the second in command, despite the fact that we already had someone holding the position who was quite excellent. Also if new people need taught things it'd fall on me or the girl. He was given zero responsibility outside of just being a counselor but of course this didn't hint at anything. He was also the groundskeeper in the offseason but was so bad at it that he was demoted and I was hired to take over all those tasks.

So our last summer there comes. The girl and I had done good jobs there so we were promoted. She became a head counselor and I became the head of the maintainence staff. He of course was still a counselor because there was no way he could run anything himself. So he basically spends the whole summer pouting over this fact and was just in general a horrible person to be around. He'd also whine to anyone that would listen to him about how unfair it was and how he should have my job or her job.

I forget when it exactly was (around April 2003 I think), but one time during work at my local Publix Supermarket, it turned into Drama night.

Short and sweet, the prom was coming up, and a pal and I at work were thinking of asking several co-workers to go. Well, he wanted to, but I was just wishful thinking. Anyway, he asked the girl I like, and she says she isn't going, so in a move I fucked up, I accidentally blabbed to the other girl he wanted to go with about it, which got him pissed off at me, and told everyone I liked the other girl.

Then in the staff room, girl #2 tells the girl I like that I liked her, thus making it very weird, especially since almost everyone working that night was there. For the rest of the night, conversation was uncumfortable, and I wanted to beat the crap out of the dude for spilling the beans.

OK, that wasn't very short at all.

Funny short work story.

Much like Scrooge I used to work in a grocery store. I find myself working the evening shift on a night we were to get a big delivery. Well, turns out the warehouse screws up and they only send 1/4 of the order. So me and a couple of guys that I worked with busted ass and hurried to get everything done and maybe even leave early. During the course of the night I noticed this chick that was shopping in the store and did the usual guy thing of pointing it out when half decent chicks were in the store. Well, after a while of hanging out in the back store room I decided to take a couple of mercy strolls (This was just walking around the store and letting the management see you so they think you're busy) and I passed the same girl that was in there earlier. Then something came to mind as she didn't seen like she was REALLY shopping at all. She was another Security Shopper (aka people dressed normal acting to shop only to catch people stealing.) and I started cracking jokes and acting like I was stealing shit. So basically I get her number or whatever and she tells me to call her after I get off. So I run into her about another hour later as I go on a lunch break and she tells me that she had a break coming up and she'll come hang out for a bit. To make a long story short, we go out to her car and she blew me. Basically after that arrangement I called her a week later, we went out for a few drinks I promptly boned her and we never talked again.

Best day of work..............EVER.

That reminds me. A couple of my friends worked at the desk at the college gym. One of them fucked some girl in his car during his lunch hour. This was also during prime hours for students to be wandering around.

DK's grocery store story kills mine, including the "Blowoff"... pun very much intended.

My last summer at the camp was pretty bad overall. A lot of people didn't do their jobs right which meant double the work for me. Though I got a lot of people in trouble with management. I basically kept a notebook of people not doing their jobs that found it's way to the bosses at review time. Typically making my life, or the lifeguards for that matter, harder equalled you getting bad reviews.

Where would this glorious world be without snitches? (imagination time) Oh... thank Goodness for us stiches.

I don't think it's snitching really. If I have to spend an hour doing something someone else was supposed to do is it really snitching if I make it known they aren't doing their job?

No... it's making people suffer the consequences of their actions.

Don't get me wrong, I think that's funny and all......especially because it wasn't me. But if someone did that to me at work, I would definately have to punch them in the face.

Quick, someone punch DK

It's not as severe as it probably sounded. I don't really give a shit as long as it doesn't effect me. It's when I have to take hours out of my day to do something that's someone else should be doing.

I'm not ragging on you or nothing. I wouldn't even care if someone I worked with did that with others............just don't do it with me. But that wouldn't be the problem because I always do my shit (otherwise I would just stay home all day and find another way to get money) so it wouldn't effect me. If I had to take hours out of my day I would totally say something to them...........but to each his own. You could have decaptitated all those fuckers for all I care.......

::Cough::drug dealer::Cough::

Here's one:

I work at a Hardware store and kinda just walk around helping people find what they need and occasionally stocking shelfs. Anyway, a few weeks ago, an old man, maybe 70-75, comes into the store in some sweatpants. He asked me where he could find copper tubing, and I noticed that there was a hole in his sweatpants, and his dick was hanging out. I told him to ask the guy in the back, even though I knew where it was, because I didn't want to help this guy and a friend of mine works back there and I wanted to see his reaction. So the guy walks to the back and asks my friend where the copper tubing is. My friend is behind a desk at a computer (my usual job) and doesn't notice the old man's dick at first. He soon notices and points it out, while not saying much. The old man looks down, then looks up and yells "where is the copper tubing?"

.... :lol:

I miss the good ol’ days of working in the catalog retail showroom. Simply cuz’ the dumb story factor was extremely high. I worked there forever (almost 6 years) and was sort of the super trooper swiss army knife guy. Lot of dumb stuff. Like:

-The guy who went to lunch, got drunk, then came back and crashed a fully extended forklift into the warehouse mezzanine. Roughly 30 gas grills and other crap went flying.

-We used to have breadmaker tossing competitions. See who could toss a boxed breadmaker over a warehouse aisle, clearing everything. One time, I got a bad launch, and the thing came flying back down and nailed me in the grill. Got consussion #.....15 from that.

-The dorky camera salesman who tired to impress some hot chic by rescuing a lava lamp from my “evil” clutches.

-Another camera guy who had a huge stockpile of old Godzilla and old monster movies hidden beneath the counter, hoping they would “disappear from inventory”. He hid them there around 1990 and forgot about them. We discovered them when tearing out the camera counter in 1995. They even had a note.

-Sitting in the break room with my buddy Jerry the Redneck. He was eating a hot fish sandwich. A bull dyke assembly tech walked in and said “mmm! What smells good?!” Jerry: “uhh, that’s my fish sammich, ma’am”. Bull dyke: “Yum! That gets my juices flowing!”

-My first job at 16 was at a movie theater. One, umm..”developmentally challenged” guy was given a gigantic ring of roughly 75 keys. All of which opened nothing.