You know the drill now. Here's the categories for a reminder:

Promo
Moveset
Finisher
Match Quality
Misc.

Final Rating

Promo: n/a

Don't think I've ever heard them cut a promo and I'm guessing there's never been a WWF promo by them.

Moveset: D

They have the generic OVW wrestler moveset meaning they SUCK!!! They do work well as a team but they've been trained to do nothing interesting or different team work wise.

Finisher: D

Not that great.

Match Quality: C-

Very carriable but lackluster. Matches are really boring unless they're facing a really good team.

Misc: D+

These guys remind me of the 80s jobber that was plain vanilla. Nothing about these guys stand out which is a shame because Doug was quite good as the Machine.


Overall: D

Complete product of the current WWF system meaning nothing sticks out about these guys and there's nothing special about them.

Promo: F
From the very very few times they've talked in the WWE, they've sucked greasy ass. I don't know how bad they were in OVW, but I'm glad they have non-speaking roles.

Moveset: D
Ultimate Generic... and nothing that even stands out.

Finisher: F
I've seen better from a blind dog humping a cat.

Match Quality: D
Have yet to have a match I would watch intentionally, or without wanting to punish myself.

Misc.: N/A
Nothing to mention.

Final Rating: D-
They suck. Plain and simple.

Promo: C-
Yeah, they haven't really cut any promos in the WWE that I've seen, but Doug was actually really good on the mic in OVW. That's the only reason they get a C-.

Moveset: C
Once again, restricted by WWE. Doug used to use an awesome running legdrop to a standing opponent (you have to see it to understand), but has since dropped this.

Finisher: D
I honestly don't know what their finish is, and I'm not joking. I know Danny used to use the Brain Damaja (Baldo Bomb) in OVW, but I don't think he's used that in WWE either...

Match Quality: C+
Well, I don't find them as boring as some people, and they always seem to hang pretty well, so I'll give them a C+. They seem to have the tag formula down well.

Misc.: D+
Eh. The few OVW guys with potential (Bashams, Conway, Eugene) are all being wasted, while pieces of shit like Snitsky and Heidenreich get pushes. Ridiculous.

FINAL RATING: C-
They have potential, but most likely won't be able to show it in the WWE.

Promo - F. Never...EVER heard them say anything. Other than like "way to go Champ" when I watched smackdown once.

Moveset - C. I can't remember ever being terribly offended by their offense, but I can't remember one single move they do. SO we'll go average, I guess.

Finisher - F. Do they have one? Some clothesline or something? Ah fuck it. F

Match Quality - D. Can't remember a good match. Average at best, but I'll say below average due to the fans sitting on their hands all the time.

Misc - B. At least they're a tag team, with matching tights, and not just some singles guys tossed together. Good music too. And I like The Cabinet.

Overall: D. A joke, like most of smackdown. (Kenzo, Booker, Dupree, Reigns)

Promo: D

They rarely talk and when they do it is incredibly forgettable.

Moveset: C-

Very generic stuff, especially coming from two competitors who were supposedly so good in OVW.

Finisher: F

Finisher? What? Does the "roll-up" count?

Match Quality: B-

Despite all of their weaknesses, the Bashams have been carried to some good matches and I actually enjoyed their Velocity work before their first WWF Tag title reign.

Overall Grade: C-

They may have become a great tag team in my EWR diary (btw, the new shows have started, I'd absolutely love some feedback) but in real life they are going no where. They started out promising, have been carried successfully a couple of times, but they could disappear tomorrow and I'd probably not notice. The most entertaining thing the Bashams ever did was participate in that Tough Enough segment where they had to block the TE kids from getting to a turnbuckle.

Promo: F
-Well, it's been said time and time again. THEY DON'T SPEAK!

Moveset: D
-I've heard from enough people to realize that both apparently were way better in OVW. Too bad were not grading OVW here.........

Finisher: F
-Well I guess to grade your finisher anything positive, you would actually need to have one in the grading process.

Match Quality:C+
-This is about the only positive that I see with them. They are definately better match quality wise than any true "tag team" that the WWE even has right now. Not like that is saying that much....

Overall Grade: D - Its not like I even dislike the Bashams that much.....they're just kind of....there.

Promo: C-
I wouldn't feel right giving them any lower because they get so little time. I'll let them prove their speaking ability to me before I judge.

Moveset: C
I've seen a few things from them that I like, and nothing terribly offensive.

Finisher: F
Do they have one?

Match Quality:B
I think they are capable of pretty good matches given the right circumstances.

Misc.:B
I like tag-teams, and I think they have potential. I think their look is fine, and being used as JBL's muscle suits them well at this point in their existance.

Final Rating: C
C would be average, and noone new in WWE is exactly tearing stuff up. Therefore, fairly average for what they are.

I always had a soft spot in my heart for the Bashams, because they are very vanilla, but they do little things well. Selling, facials, crispness of moves. I guess I'm a minimalist at heart. But if I had to judge them by the standards set up here, I'd have to go with what everybody else said, so I'm not wasting my time.

These are fun, shall we rely on Mad Dog to post more? :)

I really wish I could post on the Bashams and all, but honestly, I haven't seen them wrestle enough.

If Mad Dog does Kane, people BETTER say good things about him! :cocks shotgun:)

I'll post several this weekend then.

Hahahah. But Kane's actually a pretty good wrestler.

Kane was probably the best big guy in wrestling until Abyss showed up in TNA.

Good.. (puts away gun). If no one ever noticed, I'm probably the biggest Kane mark of all time. Benoit/Kane at BBlood was like a wet dream for me. :wub:

Biggest...like height and weight...?

Kane is: 7ft - 326lbs

Abyss is: 6'10" - 350 lbs

So - they're close.

(According to the OWW site.)

Most talented.

Actually Kane's more like 6'5'' without the lifts in his shoes.

I would say around 6'6" or 6'7", since he's only about a few inches up on Triple H, and he's around 6'3 or 6'4".

Watch carefully at a Kane appearence from 1997-2001, and and when he returned in August 2002. He seemed to have shrunk a few inches.

I think Abyss gets a little too much credit. He's had a load of strong cruisers making him look great in TNA. Kane has been booked in the crappiest of all wrestlecrap for the last few years, so it's tough to compare. I'm still not sure that either is the best big man in wrestling.

Kane tries his best and can have a good match now and then... thats all you can hope for out of anyone really. Abyss is a good bumper for a big man, but his gimmick is a total ripoff of you-know-what.

What other big men are there anyway outside of WWE and TNA? Not many, and those that are around suck because they don't know how to do anything (why is that Ryan Wilson guy still employed by TNA?!)

Kane's character has been destroyed over the last few years with no continuity in storyline, and some of the stupidest angles ever. Glen JAcobs seems to be a fairly capable performer, but it's just hard to get past the character.

I don't see a problem with his character... (sarcasm)

He was burned horribly in a fire when he was 7-8 years old, but snuck out in the middle of the night to party, and in 1992 killed a girl, and allegedly raped her dead body. Then he goes back into hiding, and is the son of Paul Bearer, because his mother is a whore.

He also dislikes coffee.

Somehow, amazingly, he's still pretty over despite constant burials and stupid fucking feuds.

Don't forget he fell into a flaming dumpster, set JR on fire, forced Lita into sex which resulted in a miscarriage, and is now a crowd favorite.

Well, it also resulted in one of my favorite signs recently...

Summerslam 2004, Lita is running away after Kane/Hardy match, and the camera has her right in front of a sign that says "Lita is a Dumas". Cracked me the fuck up.

While on Jim Ross (ew...) how come he always takes the abuse? Can't someone like Michael Cole get his ass whooped?

Maybe you missed the episode of Smackdown where Cole was anally raped by Heidereich? Set me on fire any day.

...(wishes for a throwup smiley) Thanks for reminding me of that, but I meant an actual beatdown, not insertion.

I heard Cole had sizable bruises after that. Does that count?

Simply: No.

Have you ever had extreme anal bruising? It is NO fun.








So I hear.

:shudders:

Wait...what?! ...Ewwwww.