Drama’s Smackdown Report 7/25/08Friday Night Smackdown!
July 25, 2008
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Jim Ross and Mick Foley-We recap last week’s disastrous wedding reception with Edge, Vickie and Triple H, including the awesome use of Randy Savage and Elizabeth “Together” song from Summerslam 1991.
OPENING ANIMATION
JR welcomes us to the city of brotherly love, Philadelphia for this week edition of the blue brand’s show. We begin in the VIP Lounge and again MVP is dressed very laid back again. “Big things poppin, little things droppin’. So sit back and enjoy the view, because the VIP Lounge is for people better than you.” MVP says he is a cornrow wearin’, savoi fairin, bottle poppin, mack daddy. Tonight he has one of the most controversial guests in the lounge’s history. A 4-time Intercontinental Champion, and a 7-time Tag Team Champion. We’re of course speaking of the Charismatic Enigma, Jeff Hardy. The rainbow-haired warrior comes out to his usual huge pop. MVP welcomes Jeff to Smackdown and the VIP Lounge. Tonight Jeff is involved in the biggest summer party battle royal, to determine who will face Triple H for the WWE Title at Summerslam. He runs down everyone who’s in the match: Big Show and Great Khali among others, but MVP doesn’t mention the odd-on favorite, himself. Jeff laughs and says how can you be the favorite when you haven’t won a match since you lost the US Title to my brother Matt. MVP decides to run down all the things Jeff has done this year, including losing the IC Title, being suspended, and having his house burned down. MVP says Jeff feels responsible for the death of his dog in the fire. MVP says Jeff is ruining his career with his behavior. MVP says that Jeff is reckless and he’s a detriment to everyone around him. MVP says Jeff will never, ever be WWE Champion. MVP says Jeff can throw his career away unless he starts acting like a professional. Jeff says he understands second chances, and if anyone should know second chances its MVP. Jeff says it is burning him up inside, and then he shoves MVP out of the ring. MVP just walks off as Jeff’s music plays.
-Vickie Guerrero is expected to be here tonight, as well as the largest summer block party battle royal tonight: Great Khali, Umaga, Big Show, MVP, Jeff Hardy and Mr. Kennedy. Winner faces Triple H for the WWE Title August 17 at Summerslam.
United States Champion Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang
Shelton takes the mike with his new gold, won over Matt Hardy at the GAB. He says he did exactly what he set out to do last Sunday at the Bash. Not only is he the Gold Standard, but he is the new US Champion. Fresh off the Wellness suspension, Jimmy Wang Yang is back. Shelton with a takedown followed by a boot to the head for 2. Shelton cranks the neck, and drops an elbow. Yang thrown into the corner and smacked with a right hand. Shelton lifts the leg and Yang hits the Enziguiri. Yang with some kicks and a head scissors takedown. Nice that JR can name the moves unlike Cole. Yang with some kicks and he ducks a Shelton kick but walks right into Paydirt (Shelton’s finisher) for the 3 count. Nice to see Shelton with some gold for the first time in a few years. WINNER: Shelton Benjamin (Grade: 1.5)
-Edge is pacing backstage when he runs into the new Tag Team champions, Hawkins & Ryder. He congratulates them, and says he wants to get something off his chest and apologize for what happened. They thank him, but they cut him off and say he better talk to Vickie.
WWE Tag Team Champion Curt Hawkins vs. Festus
I know they didn’t get pinned, but it was a travesty that John Morrison & The Miz lost their titles at the Bash. Festus does look bigger and bigger every day. The bell rings and Festus goes off on Hawkins with some punches. He misses a blind charge and Hawkins with some kicks low. Some forearms from Hawkins but Festus blocks a snap mare attempt and Festus chucks him. Festus with a big shoulder block knocks Hawkins out. Ryder tries to ring the bell and Jesse clotheslines him. Hawkins off the ropes and Festus hits the Hillbilly Flapjack for the win. WINNER: Festus (Grade: 1)
-With the bell rung, Festus shuts off and now Ryder cheap shots Jesse, then they both take out Festus.
-We have a piece on the WWE doing a benefit with Jenny McCarthy for Generation Rescue for Autism. Among the celebrities were Jim Carrey and Charlie Sheen. Jenny will be on Saturday Night’s Main Event next weekend to continue the cause.
-After the break and Edge is talking to the wedding planner, and he’s telling her to blend into the woodwork and Bam Neely is looking on.
Stevie Richards vs. Vladimir Kozlov
Stevie returns to the Land of Extreme to face the “Moscow Mauler” and his crazy mid-90’s theme music. They lock up and Kozlov takes him down. He misses a charge but picks Stevie up by the throat. Stevie fights back with some punches and a modified bulldog. He gets some kicks in but on one kick Kozlov catches his foot and hits a belly-to-belly suplex. Kozlov with a kick to the chest and now he cranks on a nasty armbar on Stevie. The former “King of Swing” doesn’t quit and gets a couple more kicks in. He avoids Kozlov’s charge and the Russian goes out of the ring. He returns quickly and Stevie with more kicks. Stevie hits a drop kick for a one count. Kozlov pushes Stevie into the corner but he fights back with some forearm shots. Stevie ducks a clothesline but runs into a shoulder block and Kozlov gets the 3 count. Stevie’s offense kicks the grade up a notch. Will someone give this guy a finisher? I’ve watched maybe 11 Kozlov matches and he’s finished it 8 different ways. WINNER: Vladimir Kozlov (Grade: 2)
-We have another recap of last week’s activities with Edge and Vickie.
#1 contenders Battle Royal: Mr. Kennedy vs. The Great Khali vs. MVP vs. Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy vs. The Big Show
Kennedy is officially a face as he lets the crowd help him with his name. Runjin Singh is back after Taker mangled him at No Way Out. So Big Show smiles during his entrance when he’s a babyface. The bell rings, and he have our normal breaking off of pairs, or in this case threesomes. Kennedy and Jeff go after Khali, and Umaga and MVP go after Show. Foley says that parts of MVP’s speech to Jeff Hardy earlier tonight were truly “Obama-esque”. I wish JR would put Mick in his place and tell him no one cares who he’s voting for. We go to break during the match and when we return Jeff does a Whisper in the Wind to Umaga but no one has been eliminated. MVP almost eliminates Jeff as I just realized that MVP is wrestling with his outfit half on while wearing a t-shirt. As I type that Jeff eliminates him. Umaga almost eliminates Jeff, and then goes nose to nose with Show. Show wins and eliminates the Samoan Bulldozer. Then he throws Jeff around and eliminates Kennedy. Show and Khali square off as Jeff re-coups in the corner. Show chokeslams Khali, but then Umaga comes back in and hits the Samoan Spike, which stuns him. Jeff then goes off the ropes but Show catches him, they run to the ropes and Jeff eliminates Show via a head scissors. The crowd goes insane as Jeff then Swanton Bombs Khali. He tries his damndest, but eventually Khali pitches him out. So it will be Triple H vs. The Great Khali for the WWE Title at Summerslam. Hmmm…so I guess CM Punk is ending the show August 17 in Indianapolis. WINNER: Great Khali (Grade: N/A)
-As Khali catches his breath…it’s TIME TO PLAY THE GAME. The WWE Champ comes down the aisle to a big pop. He gets right in Khali’s face as Runjin Singh pushes him back. Why does Triple H still have that crappy belt? Either they’re too lazy to switch it, or Cena’s coming back to Smackdown.
-Back from break with a vignette on Ron Killings, as “The Truth” is coming to Smackdown. Quite a change from the K-Kwik days.
WWE Divas Champion Michelle McCool vs. Maryse
I’m glad the WWE has broken all the females up into two groups: Women and Divas. They lock up and McCool with a low drop kick for 2. Maryse with a cheap shot but Michelle no-sells it (like her boyfriend) and another drop kick. Maryse pulls her hair and they’re both outside. Maryse slams Michelle’s head into the canvas and pitches her back in. Maryse with a hard whip into the corner and some punches. Maryse goes for a kick but Michelle grabs her leg and cranks up the Brazilian Heel Hook for the submission. WINNER: Michelle McCool (Grade: .5)
-We get a shot outside the Wachovia Center as we’re waiting for GM Vickie Guerrero.
-WWE Mobile presents the Raw Rebound, which highlights more anarchy involving CM Punk, JBL, Batista, Kane, and John Cena.
-Backstage and Vickie Guerrero is being wheeled up the ramp by Chavo, as Bam Neely talks about hearing Edge earlier.
-Maria’s coming to Smackdown next week. Yummy.
-Edge is backstage as Bam Neely tells him Vickie’s here. He wants to apologize, but in public.
Brian Kendrick vs. Shannon Moore
Kendrick takes the mike and says the fans are privileged to see the fastest, most superb superstar in WWE. Kendrick introduces us to his bodyguard Ezekiel, or as Brian calls him “His man Zeke”. Zeke looks like Shuge Knight. They lock up and Kendrick with a knee to the back and a kick to the gut for 2. Kendrick with a bodyslam, then goes up top and misses a knee drop. Moore with a reverse atomic drop and a butt drop. Kendrick with a shoulder block and a right hand. Kendrick then hits a reverse flip DDT-type move off the second rope, a move called “The Kendrick” for the pin. JR says Kendrick looks like a young Brian Pillman. We can only hope he’ll become half of the Loose Cannon. WINNER: Brian Kendrick (Grade: 2)
-Back from break and Edge’s music hits. The Rated-R Superstar hits the ring nervous and despondent. He takes the mike and says he wanted to come out here to apologize publicly to his wife Victoria, his baby Vickie. So he asks his wife Vickie to come out. It takes a few moments, but Chavo wheels her out with Bam Neely at his side. She gets out of the wheelchair and gets into the ring. She goes back into the chair and Chavo & Bam leave. Edge gets on one knee and tells Vickie to hear him out. He says he knows what he did was horrible, and he understands that she may not forgive him. What that video didn’t show was how many times he tried to say no, but the wedding planner was so aggressive. He said no means no, but she didn’t listen. He just couldn’t leave because he wanted to make sure the wedding was perfect. Edge says nothing means more then her happiness and love. He says he won’t and can’t live without her love. Vickie says she understands, and is smiling. They hug and the crowd gives them shit. However when he tries to kiss her she turns away, and says hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. She says when she was really pissed off at him, she did something that he may not like. Edge says ok, he understands, but what did she do? She said flat out, she reinstated The Undertaker. The crowd goes ballistic, and Edge is just a little fidgety. He says that’s ok, she’s a businesswoman and that’s good business. Edge says he can go on their honeymoon, while Taker and Triple H destroy each other, then he’ll pick the bones when they return and be WWE Champion. She says that’s nice, but she has already booked the Undertaker in a match at Summerslam, with Edge. Now he’s REALLY FIDGETING. The crowd’s ready to crap themselves. Edge says you can’t mean that baby. Oh yes, says Vickie she does mean it, and it will be….HELL IN THE CELL. The crowd does crap themselves, and as Vickie is cackling with delight Edge may have crapped himself too as we go off the air.
DRAMA’S TAKE: A show light on in-ring action but very heavy on storyline advancement. The opening segment worked as MVP really built the sympathy for Jeff Hardy to astronomical levels. MVP was kind of floating in limbo but I’m glad they strengthened his heel attitude instead of trying to push a face turn. We have a nice squash for Shelton Benjamin as he deserves to be the chased instead of the chaser. Having him a champion builds up the mid-card for someone to step up and shine. There’s no doubt that Hawkins & Ryder are transitional champions so either Finlay & Hornswoggle or Jesse & Festus can win the titles at Summerslam, but hopefully they go back around the swank waists of Morrison & The Miz. The Jenny McCarthy stuff is really good for two reasons: It puts a focus on WWE doing something good instead of all the bad steroid press, and it gives some mainstream publicity for the Saturday Night’s Main Event this coming weekend. I want to like Vladimir Kozlov, but they seem to be ignoring his character. Sure they gave him weird entrance music, but his moveset is very scattered and they can’t seem to find a consistent finisher from him. He goes from shoulder blocks to flying head butts and clotheslines. He needs some type of solid finisher that JR can come up with a cool nickname for. The Battle Royal was done for 2 reasons: To get a throwaway contender for Triple H at Summerslam, and to test whether Jeff Hardy is still on that lip that they can pull the trigger on. Both succeeded, and I’m curious as to where they go with Jeff from here. Does he feud with MVP, or go after Shelton’s US Title as a warm-up for the future feud with whoever the champ is? I also like the fact Triple H only came out for a few seconds after the battle royal, to give everyone else the rest of the show to shine. I’m very excited for Ron Killing’s debut, as he reminds me nothing of the K-Kwik years, but a guy with credibility and someone who can be a player in the main events. Michelle McCool wins in a squash, but they won’t shunt Natalya down for long. By No Mercy I see her taking the “Butterfly Belt” from McCool. I like Brian Kendrick’s character, but they need to add a little more originality. “The Kendrick” is not the name of a finisher. JR seeing a little Pillman in him is a big compliment, and hopefully Kendrick can be ½ of the Loose Cannon. The final segment paid off, as Vickie pretty much ends her relationship with Edge, and puts him in the Devil’s Den with the Deadman himself at Summerslam. Now we know why Triple H has a throwaway opponent for the WWE Title. A solid show for storyline development, but with six guys in one match the in-ring action was thin. Grade: C+
MVP: Vickie Guerrero (For delivering her lines perfectly)
Runner Up: MVP
Non MVP: Kennedy (For pretty much being forgotten in the show)
Runner Up: Hawkins & Ryder*From Scott of "Scott & Justin's PPV Reviews"*
http://bigelow34.proboards99.com/index.cgi?action=pm