Here's the deal yo, Dailymotion.com has a fuckton of older WCW Nitro matches from the mid to late 90's, and I'm going to review them.

Hurray!

But first, my two rules for this thread;

1. The match can't be over twenty-minutes long, unless there's a really good chance it'll be awesome.

2. If a match involves Chris Benoit I probably won't be reviewing it. I just don't feel comfortable speaking well in any context of a man who murdered his wife and child. Sorry....

And the first match seems like its gonna be a real winner.

Hugh Morrus vs. Steve "Mongo" McMichael (w/Debra and the haliburton case)

So, its a battle of a big man with some degree of talent in the form of Hugh Morrus and the guy people can't believe actually stayed employed for as long as he did in the form of Steve "Mongo" McMichael.

This one's gonna be ugly...

Morrus and Mongo go for a lockup, Morrus fakes Mongo out. Morrus taunts. Another lockup, Mongo knees and clubbers away. Mongo punches away in the corner. Morrus takes a whip across. Mongo hits a clothesline. Mongo proves he's no better at football than he is at wrestling as he hits a couple ugly 3-point stances. Mongo tries to follow up with a legdrop, but Morrus moves. Morrus kicks away at Mongo's newly injured leg and drops a headbutt to Mongo's "abdomen". Morrus works over Mongo with some rudimentary legwork. Morrus hits a bodyslam and heads up top for the "No Laughing Matter" moonsault. Mongo cuts him off and drops him with an ugly electric chair drop but can't recover because of his injured leg and takes a kick to the head. Morrus goes back to the leg and kicks away. Morrus hits a bodyslam and heads back up top. Meanwhile Debra slides Mongo his haliburton. Debra distracts the ref and Morrus knocks himself out with a moonsault onto the Haliburton. Mongo covers for three. DUD - Morrus has talent, but Mongo just sucks.

Hugh Morrus vs. Steve "Mongo" McMichael

Billy Kidman vs. Glacier

Appropriately enough, Glacier makes my blood run cold. He also does the same to crowd. At this stage in his career Kidman looks like a cross between Tito Santanna and one of the Ramones. He's pretty much a jobber.

Handshake to start; Glacier wrings Kidman's arm out of a lockup. He chops away (using karate!!!) and locks in a hammerlock. Kidman reverses briefly and hits the ropes. Glacier leapfrogs him but turns around to eat a dropkick. Glacier immediately kips back up and hits a legsweep. They go for another lockup and Kidman gets a quick rollup for two. Back up, Glacier reverses a whip and hits a tilt-a-whirl slam. Glacier hits a running clothesline (using karate!!). Glacier stalks Kidman and hits a solid looking front kick that knocks him into a corner and follows it up with a nice spinkick. In the corner Glacier clubbers away (with karate!!!) and kicks away. Kidman gets whipped across, Glacier hits some goofy rolling elbow thing that sends Kidman to the floor. Glacier tries to pull Kidman back inside, but eats a shoulder to the gut and a headscissors from the apron in. Kidman tries to follow up with a top-rope move but eats a sidekick on the way down. Glacier covers (not with karate this time) for three. DUD - Glacier was a fun gimmick and Kidman had some talent in WCW, but this match sucked.

Glacier vs. Billy Kidman

You know the expression "everything good comes in threes"?

Well whoever thought that one up never had to watch matches involving the likes of "Mongo" McMichael, Glacier, and now WCW's workhorse extraordinaire Roadblock.

The Giant vs. Roadblock

For those that don't know Roadblock is a big fat guy in a yellow singlet with "Road Closed" written on it. Now that's a clever gimmick.

Roadblock heads off The Giant as he steps into the ring. He chops away in the corner. The Giant reverses a whip and crushes Roadblock in the corner with a clothesline. Roadblock gets the boot up on another corner charge. The Giant clubbers his way out of a bodyslam attempt. Roadblock tries it again with similar results and winds up getting slammed himself. Back up, Roadblock tries to clubber back but he runs into a clothesline. Back up, Giant measures Roadblock and dropkicks (yes, dropkicks) him over the top through a table. Why is there a table just sitting there? Beats me...
Anyway, The Giant finishes things rather succinctly with a chokeslam. 1/4* - Not a very good match, but The Giant throwing a dropkick is worth something. Not much, but something....

The Giant vs. Roadblock

Oh my...Roadblock. Along with T. Rantula and Rick Fuller they comprised the Crappy Tubby Jobber Dream Team. I think all three went against the Giant in a handicap match, once.

Here's an oldie and probably not a very goodie.

The Giant © (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Scott Steiner - WCW Title Match

This is Dungeon of Doom Giant taking on generic face Scotty, so at least we know Steiner can still work. Oh, and The Giant's defending his world title.

We get a lockup to start and predictably Giant shoves Steiner off. Another lockup, Scotty goes behind and tries for a German suplex. He doesn't get it and breaks. Scotty tries for a single leg, but Giant blocks and smashes him with a knee. Giant blocks an attempted t-bone suplex and lands on top of Scotty when he gets him up. Giant stomps away, and I just noticed that Scotty's got taped up ribs. Giant drops a big elbow. Giant stands on Scotty in the corner and knees away at the ribs. Giant shoves Scotty out to the floor. Apparently Giant wants a countout.

Wait a minute... A seven-foot tall five-hundred pound world champion can't beat a midcard tag guy with injured ribs? Fe-fie-fo-fum WCW's booking can sure be dumb...

On the floor Scotty gets back to his feet. Giant heads outside and clubbers him down. Scotty eats post (dude, that's gay.) Giant stands on Scotty's throat. Giant steps on Scotty's ribs. Scotty gets tossed back in. Giant continues with some boring kicks to the ribs and clubbering. Giant continues his exciting streak of offense with a camel clutch, but Scotty refuses to be humbled. Giant stops an attempted comeback with some clubberin'. Giant drops a Kofi Kingston style double legdrop on the ribs and sets Scotty up in the corner. Giant drills a shoulder to the ribs a couple times and kicks away a bit. Giant clubbers Scotty and hits him with an impressive vertical suplex. Scotty gets back to his feet long enough to get clotheslined over the top. Scotty goes chest first to the rail. Giant tosses Scotty back inside.

Scotty's looked more like a sack of potatoes in this match than an actual wrestler, and if he doesn't get some offense soon he'll be mashed potatoes.

Anyway, in the time it took me to type that shitty joke, Giant grabs a wooden chair from under the ring. Scotty cuts him off with a top-rope assisted lowblow as Jimmy Hart has the ref distracted. Scotty hits the ropes and gets a chopblock. Scotty locks in a sleeper but gets smashed into the corner. Giant goes to some clubberin' in the corner, apparently enraged by Scotty's brief flurry of offense. Scotty gets whipped across, but gets the boots up on Giant's charge. Giant recoils and charges with a big splash that Scotty avoids. Holy shit! Scotty hits a t-bone suplex and throws the Giant halfway across the damn ring. Scotty taunts for minute and covers for two. Scotty hammers and kicks away at a downed Giant and nails him with a Steinerline. Jimmy Hart distracts the ref (why?) allowing Scotty to grab the wooden chair, Hart comes inside but gets tossed aside. Scotty breaks the chair over Giant's skull but he no sells it and finishes things with a chokelsam.

*1/2 - Pretty good stuff from both guys. Scotty's selling was great and his t-bone on the Giant was wicked but there wasn't a whole lot else going on.