From the pages of DWB Magazine... here's UPDATE with Lord Alfred Hayes!

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Hallo. I say, there's something .....familiar... about this newest Superstar who is set to debut in singles competition here in DWB. Could it be that we have seen this enigmatic phenom before. Or is he a daring new entity, altogether? Stay tuned to DWB for more on the exciting debut of this shocking development.

For UPDATE, I'm Lord Alfred Hayes.

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(cue the outro music)

:o Maybe this will be an interesting weekend after all!

As the newest DWB Superstar, I'm here for one reason and one reason only. To take this place down like the evil empire it is. My mission is simple. Infiltrate the main pages of DWS with recaps of old crappy shows that no one else is willing to watch, and make smart ass remarks about how much I hate Shawn Michaels. Yes, DWS'ers, a new era is about to begin. The Era of McCrack.


...

YANKEEMMM!!!

Wow, you're like no one I've ever known before!




B)

"Oh...my word!!"


But...is it who we think it is? Or is what we think we see not what we really see (tm, "Stalker" Barry Windham).

Hmmm... let's see here.

1) This guy likes to recap old shows, mainly bad ones.

2) He hates Shawn Michaels.

3) He's a smart-ass.

4) He's apparently a big fan of Glen Jacobs.


I can't say any of those ring a bell.

Wow, the Ducktales reference isn't obvious...

But if you threw in boy toucher it would sound EXACTLY like someone we know.

Think about it.

That sounds like someone I know from GStorm!! Or it could just be BS...

El Guapo was better.

Honestly, it wasn't.

Oh yeah, that can only be one person then :).

Ditto like a Motherfucker

Or how about the EmVeePee?

Was EmVeePee a gimmick?

Either way, El Guapo was the Soy Bomb

It's debatable. Either way, he turned out to be Jamie.


And El Guapo was hot hot hot.

You stole my line.

Although I have to say that I could possibly have a gimmick coming up that WILL have everything beat!

Yes, and I did it ON PURPOSE!

Did you guys already register some new "gimmick" names? I approved two, assuming they were you: "the Fuj" and "MGM"

Fuj and MGM are from the board I'm coming from. They are super fantastic.

Oh cool...so they're completely new guys?! Right on. I'll send them a friendly "welcome/get your rump in here and post" message.

I always thought it would be cool to have more Gstorm guys find their way over here. Take two really quiet boards together, and we could get a solid, consistent board :).

Yeah well, now that JD banned me for being sarcastic, expect to see a few more faces over here. I'm advertising hardcore because I love the Gstorm guys. I think they'd have fun over there, too.

I can guarantee you that sarcasm will not get you banned here.

Otherwise, we'd all be banned by now.

There's only been one banning of a regular poster since this board opened, and he even came back after a while, so don't be too worried about any that.

Well, we did have the "Jersey Invaders" about two years ago. Buncha' chuckleheads who deliberately registered for the sole purpose of bashing Scrooge n' myself. They were banned and their profiles were changed to stuff like "ImAFuckingIdiot" by DK.

They're the reason we had to institute the whole "validate new members" thing.


Oh...and it's also not a good idea to post a picture of yourself wearing nothing but a Toys R' Us replica WWF belt. You'll definitely lose "overness" points for that.

What about me? What about Scr----Launchpad?

Does his name imply that he likes to either land or launch things from his crack? Because I think it does

Let's go to the Events Center with Sean Mooney!


Mooney: "Well, after just two posts in singles competition, it's safe to say that DWB has never seen anyone quite like this tremendous new Superstar."