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- Hosts of the show are Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan (dressed as Santa) in Studio A, and Roddy Piper in Studio B. The running joke is that Heenan is reluctant being Santa, but turns into a nice guy suddenly, shocking everyone. That lasts about 5 minutes, as he bad mouths Christmas, says Santa isn't real, and pisses off Piper until Piper comes over and beats the crap out of him. The end result: Piper is removed from the show as a host for violating probation or something.


1. The Ultimate Warrior vs. Brian Costello
Commentary by Tony Schiavone and Lord Alfred. Inset promo from the (Canadian) Earthquake and Dino Bravo, advancing that angle that went nowhere, while Warrior squashes Costello with the usual. Pinfall with the big splash at 1:36. Damn, almost lasted as long as HHH at WrestleMania XII.


From the pages of the WWF Magazine, here's UPDATE: On December 27th, 1989, only on PPV, it's No Holds Barred: The Match/The Movie... what a waste of time that was. Randy Savage, Zeus, and Sherri cut a promo behind one of the cage walls.


2. Tito Santana vs. Bad News Brown:
Joined in Progress from Madison Square Garden, with Gorilla and Hillbilly Jim on commentary. This appears to be pretty late in the match, too. Nothing much of note happens, as it's mainly punchy-kicky stuff. A chair becomes involved, but nobody uses it, and both men spilling out of the ring fighting for it. This leads to a double cout-out at 4:28. Browns career is practically over, since he can't beat Tito Santana, post-Strike Force days.


3. The Bolsheviks vs. W.T. Jones & Todd Becker:
Contrary to what you might think, W.T. is not related to S.D. Squash match again, with the Bushwhackers cutting a promo during the match. New Zealand vs. USSR. WHO WINS? WHO CARES? Zhukov pins someone with a clothesline from behind. That would make Outback Jack proud.


4. Richard Charland vs. Barry Horowitz:
Joined in Progress from a Maple Leaf Garden event. Charland was a local jobber I believe, and Horowitz was a global jobber. Who wins? Probably no one. Boring, heatless stuff, with nothing more than headlocks occuring. Charland ends up picking up the victory with... an airplane spin at 6:12. I shit you not.


- Sean Mooney is taped from the Event Center, featuring promos from Rick Rude and Bobby Heenan, and Hercules. Fast forward material all the way.


5. Bret "Hitman" Hart vs. Greg "The Hammer" Valentine (w/ Jimmy Hart):
From a Meadowlands Arena card, about 7 months earlier from this broadcast. Pretty long match, featuring a lot of mat wrestling. We go to a commercial break, and the match seems clipped... then I realize this might go the distance. For whatever reason, Mr. Perfect comes out to be in the corner of Valentine, no doubt an angle that went nowhere. After some near falls from both men, the bell sounds at 18:43, signalling a 20-minute time limit draw. Decent match, but nothing spectacular.


- Courtesy of SuperStars of Wrestling, it's The Brother Love Show, with special guests Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake. Much longer than usual, as the Future-Mega Maniacs hype up their match at No Holds Barred: The Match/The Movie against Savage and Zeus.


6. Hercules vs. Greg Green:
Another squash match. Hercules wins with the torture rack ("back breaker") at 2:08. No inset promos either, meaning the match was even less meaningful.


7. Mark Young vs. The Genius:
Joined in Progress from Ft. Wayne, IN or whatever. Young has the "Marcus Bagwell" tights from when he was in Stars & Stripes, and my only previous knowledge of him is a win over Barry Horowitz at MSG. Genius does his prancy stuff, and that's the most notable part of this squash. Genius ends up taking the match with a form of cruxifix pinning combination at 2:53. Blech.


- From whatever, Dusty Rhodes is on the interview stage, and introduces the world to his newest manager, the sweet Sapphire. He's an American Dream, working hard with a fat black woman that drives trucks for a living.


8. "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka vs. "Macho King" Randy Savage (w/ Sensational Sherri):
The feature match of the week, from the Maple Leaf Garden once again. I'm pretty sure our own ES has reviewed this match a long time ago, in a galaxy far far away. This match proves my hatred for Savage matches from his 1989-90 heel run. He not only went back to his memphis heel style, but having Sherri incorporated into the match so much watered him down even more, and he rarely had a good match. As expected, this one sucks. After nothing of note happens other than a referee bump (shocking!), Sherri blasts Snuka with a loaded purse, and Savage makes the cover at 9:18. Savage really needed to cheat to pin Snuka circa '89?


Final Thoughts: As usual, the studio segments are awesome, but the matches featured on the program sucked balls. Outside of those segments and maybe Bret/Valentine, this show is just a long case of insomnia curing.

Yay!

I vividly recall that Superfly/Macho match. I'm surprised that I didn't tape Valentine vs. Hitman back then. I would've skipped Bad News/Tito, since I despised JIP matches. PTW was still on Mondays, the same night I always had to run Boy Scout meetings back then. Pretty sure I ended things early, so I get home at 8:30 and tape the "Feature Match".

Oh yeah, I think Mark Young was Jay Strongbow's kid. He'd come into the ring and do his breakdancing routine to the delight of dozens. It seemed like they had plans for him...like at least making him the new Koko B. Ware, but he disappeared shortly after this match.

And ahem... speak not to me of matches that went nowhere. That so-called inset promo was the most current continuation of a global-caliber challenge between Dino Bravo and one who was skilled in the ways of the Warrior. The number of normals who witnessed that confrontation as it devoured its own unique path across the so-called arenas and other gathering places of the world numbered exponentially high into the stratosphere. How soon the feeble-minded choose to forget that this angle was featured on the penultimate chapter before the Ultimate Challenge that men and the sands of time have chosen to label "WrestleMania 6". For it was on the Main Event in February of the year 1990 that Dino Bravo and the Candian Earthquake chose to interject their collective selves into the realms of Warrior Wildness and Hulkamania. That aforementioned duo then discovered to their astonishment that they shall not be allowed to orbit in the same large mass that is the sole property of Hulk How-gan and the Ultimate Warrioooorrrrrrrrrr.

'89 was a few years past Valentine's prime, but I'd still love to see that match with Bret. After rewatching a bunch of Crockett stuff, Greg is highly underrated.