http://www.seenoevilthemovie.com/

(camps out at theatre)

So that would bring the total number of people camping out to see this movie to.... one.

I'll see it 100 times to make up for everyone here. :D

You'll only have to see it about 15 times if you want to make up for the rest of us :P You're only going to see it 100 times because it's going to be your new favorite movie.

Eh... WOO! (camps out) I gotta get the DVD! Hopefully it's an Ultimate Ultimate Ultimate Edition.

I hate you.

:(:(:( That makes me sad... but I'll watch my best of Kane tapes to make myself happy again.

Won't it just make you sad when you realize the best match on the tape is *1/2? :P

That was uncalled for, you merchant of death.

Hehe, you're right. Especially since I just gave Kane ***1/4 for his match against HBK last week.

And especially since I give generous boosts to all of his ratings, so *1/2 to me is ** or higher.

OMG! TOP ROPE CLOTHESLINE! ***!!

That reminds me, I need to review Armageddon '99. That top of the cage clothesline on X-Pac was fuckin' awesome.

That cage match from Armageddon 1999 was one of the best matches I have ever seen Kane or X-Pac in ever. It was far better than it had any right to be, and I'd say it was an easy ***3/4.

***3/4!!? Wow... I was gonna say ***1/2. :D

Wow, that's the second time this month that it turns out I gave a Kane match 1/4* higher rating than you B)

Perhaps I'm a closet Kane mark?

I turned you to the Darkside of the Wrestling Force. :D That reminds me, I need Journey into Darkness.

And what do you mean "better than it had any right to be?" They were very compatable with each other. X-Pac still gave a shit, and Kane was probably doing his best work during that time.

Good point. It's probably because it's hard for me to remember times when Sean Waltman was motivated.

And it's hard for me to convince anyone that Waltman was motivated and that Kane doesn't suck. :)

For shame, Roweman. I should force you to watch Shane McMahon's Cult Classic "My Dinner with Kane" on a 36 hour loop.

That dinner with Kane angle was hilarious, IMHO.

Which reminds me of Trish and her dinner with Viscera.

And when crazy Saturn, Terri, and Malenko went out to dinner.

Or Al Snow sending Steve Blackman to dinner with a blind date.


WWE should do more dinner angles.

Fuck it, they should just make an entire show inside of a restaurant. Maybe Burger King. "You want a whopper with cheese on that, bitch!!?" (slaps person with big piece of meat)


I think I'll watch my Kane 2003-2004 tape. So many bad memories. Roasting Shane's nuts!!! AHH!

They should've done that back in 2000. They could have had the jobbers chasing Crash Holly around the play area trying to get the Hardcore title. Al Snow could have forced Steve Blackman to make cheeseburgers. Big Show and Rikishi could have had a burger eating contest. It would have been brilliant!

It's money in the bank I tells ya! Dammit, now I keep saying "money in the bank" ever since the match at WM 21... which had Kane in the Ladder Match, and it was really good. :D

Yeah, that Money in the Bank match was indeed a classic. Kane was well booked in the match too and contributed to the high quality of the match. I would not be surprised to see them do another one this year.

I wouldn't be against it, as long as they don't repeat the spots... and since this is my Kane Appreciation Thread, MORE memorable moments...


Winning the Tag Titles with Mankind, X-Pac, The Undertaker, Rob Van Dam, The Hurricane, and Big Show.

Beating Chris Jericho on the 9/30/02 Raw for the IC Title. Pretty good TV Match, but way too long (like 22 minutes)

TLC IV: Kane lies around for a good 10 minutes before winning!

I was still transitioning from mark to smark in 2002, so I remember really getting into that Jericho/Kane match at the time.

TLC IV was frustrating to me because Hurricane was removed from it and Bubba Ray picked Spike as his partner instead of Tommy Dreamer.

Yeah, that was so fucking gay. SPIKE DUDLEY over Tommy Dreamer? Jesus, that's like Shawn Michaels picking Marty Jannetty over Hulk Hogan for Backlash. :)


Oh and I'd cream my pants for a Kane/Hogan Program. ***** CLASSIC!

Kane and Hogan should have a match, it would be completely fresh and Hogan could have someone new to not put over :P

Really funny. HAHAHAHAHA. :lol: [/sarcasm] A fellow can dream, can't he? (imagines Kane winning the World Title at WrestleMania)

[reality kicks in]

[imagines John Cena and Shelton Benjamin's Momma with both World Titles]

I fucking hate Vince McMahon.

I suppose it wouldn't matter to you who would win between Kane and Hogan, as long as you could see them go at it.

Yeah, I see Cena at least walking into WrestleMania as champion. I wouldn't be surprised if Triple H beats him there though, especially since Triple H jobbed cleanly at the last two WrestleManias.

And Shelton's mama as champion? That would make David Arquette and Vince Russo look like good choices.

Never put anything past Vince McMahon. Have you seen the retarded Royal Rumble Commercial? Ugh... makes me sad, since the Rumble Match is my favorite of the year.

(watches Rumble 2001) Damn Kane was awesome in that one. Then Austin beats him and Kane is buried again in a midcard mini-feud with Rikishi and HAKU.

If there was ever a time to make Kane a full-time main eventer, it was right after the Rumble in 2001. He was so impressive in that match, it was sad to see him go into that Rikishi/Haku feud.

It often gets looked over, but Haku was still the WCW Hardcore champion when he showed up at the Royal Rumble.

I think everyone knew that. It was probably the only reason WWE signed him back to begin with. To dick with the shipping sip. I mean sipping ship. I mean sinking! SINKING!

Every year WWE builds up Kane as "He's gonna win the Rumble bah gawd!" but then has a horrible performance.


2002: Eliminated in 3 minutes.
2003: Does nothing of note until getting tricked by the Undertaker. BOO!
2004: Eliminated in 90 seconds.
2005: Did nothing.

I actually remember Haku getting a win over Chris Benoit on an episode of Heat once. I think it was just to keep the guy happy or something.

Kane always gets hyped up for the Rumble. Ditto for Big Show. I wonder if them being tag champions this year will lead to an angle?

Pfft. It's lazy booking. You notice whenever the creative team kills off either of their heat, they are stuck into meaningless tag teams? In 2001, Show was teaming with random people (Billy Gunn, Spike Dudley), and Kane does it yearly.

However, I do enjoy them as a team. More meat and less sizzle from both. They can hit their big moves and tag out whenever they want. Plus they look like an unbeatable team.

Next Week: Fabulous Moolah and The Haiti Kid's Ghost win the Tag Titles

Yeah, kayfabe-wise they have done a good job of making Kane and Big Show seem unbeatable (partly by having them squash the entire Raw tag team division, by oh well).

I really don't know who to expect them to lose the belts to, other than possibly Carlito and Chris Masters.

Kane/Show squashed the entire division in the same 2 minute match! Despite the horrible booking of the other guys (wait... Vis? Hearthrobs? TOMKO!? SNITSKY?!?!), that was fucking awesome.

Yeah, I don't feel bad for watching most of those guys get squashed, but I would have liked to see Val Venis and Viscera get built up better.

I'm still bummed that Trevor Murdoch and Lance Cade were broken up so quickly too, especially since neither of them are doing anything anyhow.

It would seem that the Kane/Show tag team is helping both guys out. Unless it is just me, their crowd responses have improved as of late.

It has a bit, but both guys were hurt pretty badly over the last year or so. Remember, Kane was Edge's bitch for most of 2005. Hopefully this time next year, Kane isn't squashing Edge in 30 seconds like he did Snitsky, another piece of garbage he was sacrificed to.

I think Edge winning the WWE Championship will spare him the same fate as Gene Snitsky. Even Chris Jericho didn't have to do 30 second jobs to anyone after he lost the title.

Kane did come out of that Edge feud badly. They had a decent little match at Vengeance though, one that I'm pretty sure Kane won.

Big Show was booked strongly last year against JBL and managed to come out of that feud without ever being pinned (that I'm aware of). His WrestleMania sumo match hurt him a lot though, as did his mini feuds with Carlito and Matt Morgan.

Exactly. WWE sees these big guys not named the Undertaker and thinks they cna bury them over and over again, then regain their heat by having them squash all of the JTTS guys. For Kane or Show to get serious over again, they need to decimate the entire main event roster in the same match. No one will buy them as main eventers again if they squash losers like the Heart Throbs every other week.

(rememberS)

OH FUCK! Three Minute Warning is coming back. Sweet Jesus, what did Kane do to deserve this?!!? :(