March to WrestleMania VII: Superstars & Stripes Forever
- Before I get to the review, here's a simple warning that this is not the complete show, as it seems to be missing a squash match or two and several of the lame backstage interviews that were taped weeks after the matches were, so since I love you people (in a complete heterosexual way), I'll review the "Bonus Matches" tacked on after the stuff from the show to compensate for the lack of footage. Warning #2: The sound is almost non-existant, so if my match times are off from yours, eat chocolate ice cream out of my ass you pig-eyed smell sticks.
- WWF Intercontinental Championship Match:
Mr. Perfect © vs. Shawn Michaels:
I could've sworn this was on later in the broadcast, but what the hell do I know? It's also probably not for the IC Title, but again, what the hell do I know? Perfect doesn't have Heenan with him and Michaels doesn't have Jannetty. In a USA Network fuck up, they spell Michaels' name as "Sean Michaels." This match was also recycled for World Tour '91, except they dubbed in Mooney and Hayes over McMahon and Heenan's commentary. Lockup to start, but that doesn't go anywhere for either of them. Go behind waistlock by Michaels is countered with an elbow to the face. OK, so it's not a counter. Perfect with a hammerlock, but Michaels fights out and makes him oversell a punch. We get some smack talk from both men, with Michaels acting as some kind of bad ass. They do a mock fist fight, with Michaels flooring Perfect with a whiffer, and sending him crawling out of the ring. Michaels goes high risk with a suicide dive over the top rope and smacking the security rail! Holy shit! He no sells that though (surprise...) and pounds on Perfect more, but gets somewhat flap jacked onto the security railing in retaliation. Here comes Marty Jannetty to check on Michaels. Commercial Break... We come back with Perfect dragging Michaels in by the hair and hammering away with rights. Perfect connects with a standing dropkick for a two count. Perfect works over Michaels in the corner. Irish whip to the corner gives Michaels a chance to flip onto the apron and get taken out with a clothesline (a spot obviously stolen from Ric Flair). Perfect bangs the back of Michaels' head into the canvas and talks smack to Jannetty. Perfect with a knee to the midsection sends Michaels out of the ring. Snapmare by Perfect and he executes the float-over neck snap for a two count. Perfect continues hammering on Michaels, but dramatically oversells being kicked in the face. Perfect manages to overcome that and apply a sleeper hold. Michaels battles back up and breaks the hold with a jaw breaker (not the candy!). Perfect comes back with a knee lift, and Michaels matches Perfect overselling with some of his own. Perfect slaps Jannetty, so Jannetty punches him down. Heenan leaves the broadcast position and comes to ringside to complain. Perfect rolls out of the ring to ram Jannetty into the ring post. Back inside the ring, and Perfect gets sent to the corner. Michaels trips him up and crotches him on the ring post. Michaels kicks the leg from under Perfect's leg, with MORE overselling. Michaels with an atomic drop and clothesline for a two count. Irish whip and Michaels connects with the reverse crescent kick for another two count. Irish whip is reversed, but Michaels takes down Perfect with a swinging neck breaker. Michaels heads to the top rope... Heenan tries knocking him off, but Michaels avoids it. Perfect attacks from behind and quickly puts him in the Perfect-Plex, but Boss Man runs in to give Perfect the win by Disqualification at 10:23. They needed to protect Rocker Shawn Michaels?! Boss Man and the Rockers clear Perfect from the ring after the match. *** Good match, but if not for the hot last few minutes, this would've ended up in the file I like to call meaningless matches that no one bothers to comment about. I could've done without the over-the-top overselling from both men, but that's what they are good at, so more power to them. For some reason, Andre The Giant appears near the curtain and shakes Boss Man's hand (after we get the feeling Andre might not be a good guy).
- Highlights from the 11/90 Main Event where Randy Savage ran in to attack the Warrior with that plastic thing he called a scepter (or whatever). Then we cut to the 1991 Royal Rumble. Randy Savage runs in (several times) and smashes Warrior over the head with the same thing, shattering it in the process, and allowing Sgt. Slaughter to win the World Championship. For a guy that was from Parts Unknown, why was he dressed up in american flag colors? He isn't from America! He's from Parts Unknown God Dammit!
- The Contract Signing between the Ultimate Warrior and "Macho King" Randy Savage. We all know how this goes. We've got Mean Gene Okerlund, Jack Tunney and a gaggle of idiot stooges of the WWF standing around trying to look important. Savage talks smack to the Warrior before putting his John Hancock on the contract. Warrior paces around like an idiot for the entire segment, which goes on for way too long. In a moment I didn't remember, The Undertaker comes out for some reason to staredown the Warrior, which I guess hinted they would be feuding a few months later, and thus give away who was winning the match right there.
- Jake "The Snake" Roberts Promo. He basically runs down the Model Rick Martel, his scheduled opponent for WrestleMania VII in a Blindfold Match, but since the volume on this tape is craptastic and I need some time filling rambling, that's what I'm doing right now. A Davey Boy Smith squash match was to take place in the spot I'm rambling in, but because of conflicting interests, here we go with the Blindfold Warm-up Match...
- Blindfold Match:
Koko B. Ware vs. "The Model" Rick Martel:
It's the long-waited ReMatch from WrestleMania VI where Martel squashed Ware without breaking much of a sweat (at least that's how Coliseum Video made it look to be). Martel talks smack before the match and shoves Ware off. Ware returns the favor by punching on Martel and taking him over with a back drop. Ware connects with a series of dropkicks before Martel heads to the outside. Ware puts on his hood, so Martel beats the piss out of him for making him look like a chump earlier. Martel stomps an Arrogance mudhole in Ware while Ware wanders around like a moron. Way to oversell the "blind" part Koko. Martel heads outside to ram Ware into the ring post, and FINALLY both men are hooded. Ware smacks the canvas a lot and continues making loud noises to give us the idea Martel can tell where he is by the vibrations. They do nothing but crawl around until Martel grabs Koko by the ankles and turn him over into the Boston Crab for the submission victory at 4:21. DUD That sure did suck, but at least the actual "match" part of this was only about 90 seconds long. Martel goes back to work on Koko after the match, because he's a heel and all.
- Roddy Piper conducts a special interview with semi-arch-nemesis, the Million $ Man, Ted Dibiase. Of course, I can't hear much of what they're saying, but you can tell they are yelling at each other because Dibiase is a heel and Piper is the face. Virgil comes to the little podium thing to back up Piper, probably because Dibiase threatened to beat up a cripple. The Piper/Dibiase series of matches sure went nowhere when it came to television, eh? Afterwards a Greg Valentine squash match happend, but who cares?
- Hulk Hogan vs. General Adnan:
Unusual match here, mainly because Hogan almost never wrestled on television, even PrimeTime Wrestling, unless it was a match taken from a MSG or various other Arena Shows. Adnan is the manager of Sgt. Slaughter, so don't expect this to go long. Adnan brings an Iraqi flag with him into the ring. The crowd goes happy for Hogan's entrance, and he brings out a towering pole with the american flag. Adnan attacks before the bell and scratches Hogan's back for him. Hogan's selling is pretty funny here. Adnan continues to punch and scratch Hogan. Rake of the eyes to change it up, but Hogan comes back with a kick to the face. Adnan begs him off, but Hogan isn't Mr. Nice Guy and hammers away. Irish whip and Hogan nails the running clothesline (axe bomber?). Adnan begs more, and here's Slaughter to attack Hogan with the World Title, giving Hogan the Disqualification victory at 1:04. Sgt. Slaughter beats Hogan down like yesterdays garbage and applies the Camel Clutch while Gen. Adnan holds the World Title in front of him (upside down). Slaughter continues beating Hogan with the Iraqi flag, then drapes it over him to end this nonsense. DUD Match barely started, and it woyld've sucked if it went longer. Adnan gives Rene Goulet a shot to the stomach with the flag pole for my amusement.
- Bret "Hitman" Hart (w/ Jim Neidhart) vs. Brian Knobbs (w/ Saggs & Jimmy Hart):
For those not familiar with the booking here, it's the anual "1/2 of the Tag Team Title Match Participants Match" where they pair up the more talented member of 1 team with the least talented of the other, but when the Nasty Boys both suck equal amounts of ass, they probably took Jack Tunney's rigged 50 cent piece and flipped it to see who gets to job here. Neidhart does the honors of giving out the sunglasses, since he has nothing better to do. Lockup to start, with no one getting the advantage. Hart teases a cheap shot in the corner, but the referee talks him out of it. This time Knobbs takes Hart to the corner and does the dirty deed. Hart is introduced to the turnbuckle and Knobbs hammers away. Irish whip to the corner is reversed and Hart takes over Knobbs with a hip toss. Hart with an atomic drop followed by an inverted style and diving back elbow to send Knobbs out of the ring. Usually Hart does a clothesline following the inverted atomic drop, but he changed it up to spite me here. Knobbs wastes some time, so Hart slingshots him back into the ring. Knobbs rakes the eyes to take control and punches some more. Irish whip and Hart comes off the ropes with a cross body press. He opts not to cover and hammers away on Knobbs. More stalling attempted, but Neidhart tosses Knobbs back inside. Hart applies a wristlock and takes Knobbs over into an armbar. Knobbs escapes with a forearm to the side of the head, and that's about 90% of his offense. Irish whip and Hart blocks a big boot. Neidhart takes out Saggs then chases Jimmy Hart off, but the interruption gives Knobbs a chance to clothesline Hart from behind, then again from the front. THE BOOMERANG BROTHER! For those that don't remember, that was Outback Jacks finishing move. Knobbs tries a slam, but Hart lands on top for a two count. Knobbs is back in control though doing his usual shitty stuff. Hart works in his "sell the whip to the corner like it breaks your back" spot. Hart reverses another, but runs into the boot of Knobbs. Knobbs with some shitty kicks and a rake of the eyes. Irish whip and they manage to fuck up a face-first slam into the canvas spot. Hart comes back with a series of roundhouse rights. Irish whip and Hart gets a fist to the midsection, followed by the russian leg sweep for a two count. Snap suplex by Hart gets another two count. Side back breaker and second rope elbow drop connects while Neidhart gets suckered intot he security railing by Saggs. Hart continues to bring the pain until Saggs trips him up. Knobbs connects with an ugly piledriver for a two count. Saggs holds Hart from the apron, but that doesn't go well and Hart nails the Hart Attack clothesline (without the "hold him up" part) for the three count at 9:31. 3/4* Hart didn't look to be too into the match, and we all know how shitty both of the Nasty Boys are. Short and sweet, when Bret Hart phones it in, watch out, because he phones it in with the best of them.
- Tugboat vs. The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer):
Fairly early in Paul Bearer's run as the Undertaker's manager, as he took over the duties of Brother Love about three weeks before the Ultimate Warrior beat him into retirement. Brother Love's retirement lasted about 7 times longer than the loser of the Career Ending Match (Brother Love didn't reappear until the Fall of 1995, but then vanished again a few months later). Undertaker attacks before the bell and hammers away on Tugboat in the corner. Irish whip to the corner and Undertaker nails the Stinger Splash! Choking by the Undertaker while we get a shot of Paul Bearer looking ugly. Irish whip across the ring again, but Undertaker misses this time. Tugboat tries a slam, but falls under the weight of 'Taker (...yeah...). Undertaker misses an elbow drop, but comes off the ropes with a diving clothesline. More choking from the Undertaker. Tugboat tries fighting back but Undertaker ain't selling. Another slam attempt fails and Undertaker gets a two count. Undertaker with an elbow drop followed by a sit-down across across the middle rope a la Big Boss Man. Undertaker takes forever before executing a jumping knee drop, but misses the elbow drop that always misses. Irish whip and Tugboat catches Undertaker with a powerslam, but it's no sold. Avalanche in the corner by Tugboat, but he misses the second. Undertaker leaps onto the apron, climbs up top, walks the rope a second and nails the elbow drop for the victory at 3:29. 1/2* Only giving this a non-DUD because I hated Tugboat and the Undertaker pretty much squashing him was awesome. I didn't notice until recently that Tugboat was for some reason not included on the WrestleMania VII Card. After the match, Undertaker spreads dirt on the Tugboat. I prefer the body bag jobs myself, but I guess this was early in the braintrust of the Undertaker gimmick.
Final Thoughts: From what is on this tape from the broadcast, it's not a very good show. The "opener" (I'm still convinced the tape was slightly altered) was pretty good, but everything after that was rather horrible because the workrate sucked (Hart/Knobbs, Tugboat/'Taker) or because it was stupid booking (Ware/Martel, Hogan/Adnan). While some people might enjoy this, I can't say it's recommended viewing. Funny... the only good match is stuck on a show with nothing else that's any good and a Coliseum Video that's basically the same way. Thumbs Down.
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Bonus Matches Portion (WWF Television from February-April 1991)
- We join a Earthquake squash match from Superstars already in progress. He lays an ass beating on the unknown punk scrub until The Mariner/Run-In Man/Furface/Whatever runs in and lays Earthquake out with a series of headbutts. With Earthquake out, the Mariner Man with Fur goes after Jimmy Hart, and they run up the aisle and out of sight. For those that washed this out of their memory or just don't know, the masked man was Brutus Beefcake. You can tell judging from the little gut he has.
- 7-Tag Team #1 Contender's Battle Royale:
(Participants: Road Warrior Hawk & Animal, Marty Jannetty & Shawn Michaels, Bushwacker Butch & Luke, Hercules & Paul Roma, Brian Knobbs & Jerry Saggs, Kato & Tanaka, Demolition Smash & Crush)
From the 2/16/91 episode of Superstars of Wrestling. The usual rules of Tag Team Battle Royale's... when one member from a team is eliminated, then his partner is automatically eliminated as well. I've always hated that rule, since you can't help what your partner does in such a crowded ring, but whatever. As usual, I'll save the PBP until the ring clears up a bit. Demolition do a double press on the Rockers, but both slide down and Smash goes flying out at 1:40 thanks to a reverse cresent kick by both Rockers. Crush seems to not know the rules, as the referee has to tell him for about an hour to leave. In the meantime, Luke is dumped out by Kato at 2:10 following a Tanaka crescent kick. Roddy Piper says it's the luck of the draw that wins... to bad EVERYONE STARTS AT THE SAME TIME. Michaels accidentally dropkicks Jannetty out at 2:51. After a whole lot of nothing, The Express are gone next, with Hawk back dropping Kato out at 4:40, and Animal press slamming Tanaka out on top of him. The Nasties and Power & Glory pair off to work over Animal and Hawk. Power & Glory try the launching body press, but Animal catches Roma dn dumps him over the top rope at 5:40. The LOD dominate the Nasty Boys, but as Hawk goes for the Doomsday Device (in a Battle Royale?!) Hercules crotches Hawk on the top rope and pulls him to the floor, making the Nasty Boys the winners at 6:09. N/R Not very good for a Battle Royale, but I've seen much worse. At least it was kept short enough to not entirely suck. This would set up the LOD/P&G massacre from WrestleMania VII.
- Big Boss Man vs. The Barbarian:
Taken from the 12/13/90 show held in what looks like London, Ontario, and one of the most recycled shit matches ever. This appears on several Coliseum Videos and plenty of episodes of PrimeTime Wrestling for some reason. Thank God, we are Joined in Progress with the Barbarian posing over the fallen Boss Man. Mooney and Lord Alfred are on commentary to further make this match enjoyable. Barbarian with a series of blows to the back of Boss Man followed by applying a bearhug. Boss Man breaks free with a series of headbutts and biting of the forehead. Barbarian is back to no selling though and floors Boss Man with a big boot. According to Hayes, that was a karate move... yeah. Barbarian heads to the second rope for the elbow drop that always misses, and of course, it misses. Both men exchange blows... very... slowly. Boss Man takes control of the match with his shots and nails an enziguri! That only gets a two count, though. Irish whip and Boss Man stuns Barbarian across the top rope for another two count. Boss Man heads up to the top rope and comes off with a cross body, but Barbarian rolls through for a two count. Barbarian counters a piledriver with a back drop, but Boss Man sunset flips him as he poses in a pinning cover, and Boss Man picks up the duke at 4:57. Did every fucking Barbarian match end like that?! After the match Haku runs in for some double team beatings on the Boss Man. 1/4* A partial point for the enziguri, but the match sucked ass. The full match, which runs around 14 minutes long, is as bad as you could imagine with plenty of resting, stalling, and more stalling.
- Shawn Michaels (w/ Marty Jannetty) vs. Demolition Crush (w/ Mr. Fuji):
From the 2/18/91 episode of PrimeTime Wrestling. Pretty odd pairing here, as everyone but Demolition's Smash is at ring side. They lockup and Crush hammers away on Michaels. Irish whip to the corner by Crush, but he misses an elbow. Michaels mounts Crush for a series of punches and connects with the reverse crescent kick followed by a series of clotheslines and a diving shoulder tackle. They brawl outside the ring and Crush hammers away on him some more. Crush attempts a gorilla press slam, but Michaels escapes it and connects with a hurricanrana. Crush walks into a drop toe hold of Michaels and Shawn applies a front face lock. Crush battles back up to his feet and catches Michaels in his famous Tilt-o-Whirl back breaker followed by an over head back breaker for an early two count. Crush continues to hammer away on Michaels and he applies the bear-hug. Michaels takes a moment to sell then fights his way free. Irish whip is reversed by Crush and he sends Michaels into the corner which he sells like he's Bret Hart with a nasty thud. Crush applies a body scissors in the middle of the ring and he must be winded already, and the crowd cheers for Michaels to escape. Crush releases the hold and connects with a massive back breaker. Crush heads to the top rope to finish Michaels off, but he misses the knee drop and now both men are down. Michaels works the leg with kicks and attempts a high cross body press, but Crush catches him. The referee is distracted as Jannetty comes off the top rope to give Michaels enough leverage to land on top of Crush for the cover, and that actually gets the three count at 7:18. ** Nothing special here, but it was decent enough and this was back when Michaels gave a shit without being a complete crybaby asshole. I think I'd rather have seen The Rockers vs. Demolition rather than this singles match... OK, maybe not, since the Smash and Crush version sucked.
- Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. Kato (w/ Tanaka & Mr. Fuji):
From an episode of PrimeTime Wrestling a few weeks before WrestleMania VII, and we're Joined in Progress. The full match can be found on the 2nd Annual Battle of the Superstars Coliseum Video. Kato dumps Roberts out of the ring, and we all know where that is going. Fuji smacks Roberts across the back with his cane. Tanaka comes over now to get in a cheap shot of his own. Back inside the ring finally. Kato with a scoop slam and elbow drop for a two count, and he wastes little time going to a reverse chinlock. Roberts escapes with a jaw breaker and comes back with a series of left jabs. Short-arm clothesline connects, and that usually means we're getting the DDT. Roberts goes for it, but Tanaka runs in to give Roberts a cheap shot, but the referee doesn't see it. Kato pounds away on Roberts more, but Roberts counters a slam and nails the DDT. Tanaka runs in again, but he's caught, and Roberts wins by DQ at 2:41. Roberts cleans house of Tanaka and kills him with a clothesline. Roberts grabs Damian now and chases Mr. Fuji up the aisle with it. 1/2* Not much is shown, but the full match isn't much better. It's basically PunchaMania VII with some resting and lame cheating... and what the hell was up with protecting KATO against Jake the fucking Snka Roberts? Damn WWF and their booking logic.
- WrestleMania VII Report! Coming up on March 24th, 1991 from the city of Angels. All the matches have been announced for the PPV, and since I have time to fill here, is the card..
- Sgt. Slaughter (World Champ) vs. Hulk Hogan
- Ultimate Warrior vs. "Macho King" Randy Savage in a Career Ending Match
- Virgil vs. "Million $ Man" Ted Dibiase
- Mr. Perfect (IC Champ) vs. Big Boss Man
- Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. "The Model" Rick Martel in a Blindfold Match
- The Hart Foundation (Tag Champs) vs. The Nasty Boys
- Legion of Doom vs. Power & Glory
- The British Bulldog vs. The Warlord
- "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker
- Tito Santana vs. The Mountie
- The Rockers vs. The Barbarian & Haku
- Greg "The Hammer" Valentine vs. Earthquake
- "Texas Tornado" Kerry Von Erich vs. Dino Bravo
- Tenryu & Kitao vs. Demolition (Smash & Crush)
- Greg "The Hammer" Valentine vs. Dino Bravo:
Originally broadcasted on the 2/17/91 episode of Wrestling Challenge, but this is taken from an episode of PrimeTime Wrestling, and it's Joined in Progress with Bravo hammering away on Valentine. Bravo with some French-Canadian mudhole stomping and choking across the middle rope. Jimmy Hart talks smack to Valentine, who is kissing canvas. Bravo with a scoop slam but he misses the jumping elbow drop. Valentine with an atomic drop followed by some kicking to the back of the left leg. Bravo comes off the ropes with an elbow drop, and it's time for the Figure-Four. Right on time, here comes Earthquake to run in and give Valentine the DQ win at 1:34. The full match is maybe a minute longer, at most. Earthquake and Bravo work over Valentine until the Mariner runs in again to attack Earthquake. In a nod for marks, Beefcake just saved his former Dream Team partner.
- Tito Santana & Koko B. Ware vs. Demolition (w/ Mr. Fuji):
From the 3/11/91 episode of PrimeTime Wrestling, and about 15 seconds joined in progress. I'm surprised Santana and Ware are teaming up, since a few weeks earlier they aired a match where Ware (where-where! AHAHA!) was acting a like a heel and punked Santana out for being a soft taco. Ware and Smash are the legal men in the ring. Smash hammers away in the corner, but misses one and Ware escapes. Ware rolls through the legs of Smash and rolls him up for a two count. Santana comes in with an axehandle off the second rope and applies a wristlock. Irish whip and Santana with a shoulder block, followed by a dropkick. Santana applies an armbar, but Smash escapes with a punch and Crush tags in. Irish whip to the corner and Crush misses a charge. Santana with a series of blows and a series of dropkicks for a two count. Santana goes back to work on the arm and takes Crush over with an armbar. Irish whip and Smash clotheslines Santana from the apron to start the heel heat segment. Crush dumps Santana outside where Fuji gets to work in his traditional cane cheap shot. Back inside the ring and Crush connects with a back breaker. Smash tags back in and pounds on Santana with sledges while Hayes talks about their upcoming match with Kitao and Tenryu at WrestleMania VII. Crush comes off the top rope with a sledge to the back of Santana. Crush with a rake of the eyes and applies a bearhug. Smash hammers away on Santana in the corner. Santana comes back with shots of his own, but gets a knee to the midsection to break the momentum. Irish whip to the corner and Santana boots Smash in the face. Santana comes out of the corner with a diving forearm. Ware gets the hot tag and take Smash down with a swinging neck breaker. Another neck breaker to Crush. Ware comes off the top rope with a missile dropkick to Smash, but it only gets a two count. Ware goes for the Ghostbuster, but Crush kicks Ware's leg from under his leg and Smash covers for the three count at 5:53. Wow... lame finish. * The faces seemed game for it, but Smash and Crush were horrible as a team, and the total greeness of Crush didn't help. This was probably the last feature match victory for Demolition, and they couldn't even beat Koko B. Ware clean. How sad.
- Marty Jannetty vs. Tanaka (w/ Mr. Fuji):
COPY & PASTE TIME! From the 3/15/91 Madison Square Garden event and televised on the 4/1/91 episode of PrimeTime Wrestling. Mooney has a bad habit of calling Jannetty "Shawn Michaels". Both men dance around a bit before locking up. Tanaka with a kick to the back followed by a reverse crescent kick. Chops to the back of the neck and Jannetty is rammed to the buckle. Jumping headbutt by Tanaka and he applies a side headlock. Irish whip by Jannetty and Tanaka with a shoulder block. Criss cross leads to Tanaka running into a big forearm of Jannetty and he runs outside. Back in the ring and Jannetty applies a side headlock. Irish whip and Jannetty with the shoulder block followed by another roundhouse right to send Tanaka outside...again. Jannetty with a plancha out of nowhere puts Tanaka down. Tanaka is back inside again and he unties a turnbuckle. Jannetty teases jumping on Fuji and Tanaka...CAN'T remove the turnbuckle. Shoves by Tanaka and Jannetty hammers away on him and nails a diving back elbow followed by a reverse crescent kick! Tanaka hides in the corner and rams Jannetty into the semi-exposed turnbuckle. Irish whip to the corner is reversed but Jannetty cross body presses the ring post and lands outside the ring. Tanaka distracts the referee but Fuji doesn't cane him. Snapmare by Tanaka followed by a headbutt below the belt. Tanaka with a thrust to the throat of Jannetty and he continues with the chops to the neck. Irish whip to the corner and Tanaka runs into a big boot. Jannetty to the second rope with a modified bulldog headlock for two. Jannetty pummels Tanaka in the corner but is tripped up and Tanaka covers with his feet on the ropes, only for a two count. Jannetty with a school boy from behind gets two as well. Tanaka catches Jannetty with the crescent kick. Irish whip and Jannetty is nailed with a spinning cross body for two. IN the corner they go and Tanaka with a BIG chop sending Jannetty flying over the top rope. Jannetty is nailed with a series of headbutts on the apron, but he slide sback in between the legs and whips Tanaka to the ropes, but Tanaka puts him back down with a double axe-handle. Tanaka scoops Jannetty up for a tombstone piledriver but Jannetty reverses and nails a SICK looknig piledriver of his own for the three count at 10:52. **3/4 Match started off slow but the second half picked up quite a bit. I expected something better from the opinions of several other random people, but I ended up being disappointed once again.
- The British Bulldog vs. The Warlord:
Also from the 3/15/91 event held at Madison Square Garden, but I don't think this was ever televised on a national broadcast. These two must've wrestled 100 times in 1991, and their best match maybe peaked at *1/2, so I'm not expecting anything good out of this one.Warlord attacks before the bell, but Bulldog fights back and sends him running out of the ring following a clothesline. Back in the ring, and Warlord gets to waste some time. Lockup, and Warlord shoves the Bulldog into the corner and poses. Lather, rinse, repeat. Warlord wants a test-of-strength, and we actually get it. Warlord starts losing, so he boots Bulldog in the midsection and clubs him across the back. Irish whip and a shoulder block doesn't move anyone. Bulldog does the multiple shoulder blocks spot to knock Warlord down, and we get more stalling outside of the ring. Warlord comes back in with his usual shitty and slower than hell offense. Irish whip and Bulldog goes for the crucifix. Warlord blocks it and connects with a Samoan drop. Warlord connects with a series of sharp elbow drops for a two count. Warlord pounds away on the arm of Bulldog in the corner and catches him coming out of the corner in a bear-hug. This lasts a while until the Bulldog gets knocked out of the ring on a collision. Warlord with more clubbing blows. They exchange shots until the Warlord rakes the eyes. Warlord scoops up the Bulldog and connects with a back breaker, followed by a fist drop for a two count. Reverse chinlock applied to continue making my night. Bulldog fights free and connects with a dropkick. Warlord gets introduced into the turnbuckle a few times and Bulldog heads up to the second turnbuckle for a diving forearm. Bulldog with a cross body press for a two count. Irish whip and Bulldog boots Warlord in the head. Piledriver attempt is blocked, but Bulldog tries a sunset flip now. Warlord blocks, and Bulldog finishes the move for a two count. Bulldog tries a charge to the corner, but eats boot. Warlord tries for the running powerslam, but Bulldog holds onto the ropes. Warlord misses a charge and Bulldog rolls up Warlord for the three count at 10:33. DUD Painfully bad match, but I don't feel like going into the negatives for it. I wonder if the WrestleMania match was this bad (I've only seen the clipped to two minutes version). Warlord attacks after the match, but doesn't continue it for too long.
- Shawn Michaels (w/ Marty Jannetty) vs. Kato (w/ Tanaka & Mr. Fuji):
Copy and Paste Part II. It's another match stolen from the March 15th MSG show, rebroadcasted on an 4/91 episode of PrimeTime Wrestling, and we're joined in Progress as Kato applies the vulcan nerve pinch of doom that usually is only allowed to be done by Japanese guys and evil Samoans. Michaels fights free with elbows to the midsection, but Kato puts him down with a knee lift for a two count. Kato whips Michaels to the corner hard. Irish whip is reversed and Kato with a cross body, but Michaels rolls through for two. Kato with an atomic drop followed by a clothesline for two. Kato applies a nerve pinch again. Michaels with a victory roll gets a two count, but Kato is back up and stomps away at Michaels. Snapmare by Kato and another nerve lock. Kato with several two counts with the hold. Shawn starts no selling and drives a few elbows to the midsection and drops Kato with a bionic elbow into the back of the head. Kato puts the boots to Michaels in the corner and hammers away with rights. Corner charge misses and Kato gets posted with his legs wrapped around the post somehow. Shawn fights back and connects with an inverted atomic drop followed by a clothesline. Michaels with a series of roundhouse rights and a reverse crescent kick. Michaels to the top rope and he comes down with a flying elbow drop for a two count. Irish whip and Michaels with a roll up for two, but Kato reverses for a two count of his own. Michaels bounces off the ropes but he gets tripped up. Marty & Fuji distract the refere as Michaels goes for a backslide but Tanaka uses the cane to knock Shawn silly and Kato gets the pinfall at 3:48. *1/2 The horrible clipping of the match hurts how good it really was. The full version is on the 3/25/91 episode of PrimeTime Wrestling, and it's pretty damn good, too.
Final Thoughts #2: These matches suck.