Velocity for WWE.com

Scotty 2 Hotty beat Eddie Craven. Nothing special.
Simon Dean beat Paul London. Wrong guy got the win. No one really cares about Dean.
Kid Kash beat Funaki. Kash looked as good as he used to in ECW. Good match.
Hardcore Holly beat Sylvain, and then ended up beating him up some more.


Smackdown for UPN

The Ortons did a promo about beating Undertaker and then challenged Batista to a match for the WWE Title. Eddie Guerrero came out as a babyface, and a number one contender match is made for the WWE Title tonight.

US Champion Chris Benoit beat Orlando Jordan in the feud that will never die. Jordan threatened never to wrestle again if he didn't win. Yawn for the stipulation. Benoit is so intense live, he makes the crowd think it could be real.

Mr. Kennedy came out and introduced himself.

Chalk one up for Paul Heyman, because Tank and Chad Toland are in WWE! The Mexicools defeated Paul Burchall and William Regal, and then The Tolands attacked. It was short, intense, and belivable. Just like The Tolands.

I read in another spoiler it was The Shane Twins, but it wasn't. That is inaccurate. It was The Tolands.

Christian hosts The Peep Show with Stacy Keibler, who addresses the Star Magazine story about her and Jennifer Anniston. Jillian Hall comes out, but Stacy makes fun of her face and ends up slapping Jillian. A new catfight feud is born.

Booker T won a Fourway Match vs JBL, Rey Mysterio, and Christian when Booker pinned Rey after Sharmell interfered without Booker knowing it. The crowd was going nuts for this match.

Bobby Lashley pinned Nunzio. Good night for the Paul Heyman alumnae. Lashley was awesome.

More OVW alums as Boogeyman debuted during a Palmer Cannon - Teddy Long promo. He has a unique look and his promo was awesome. I know you don't believe me, but it's true.

Eddie Guerrero beat Randy Orton via DQ after Bob Orton interfered. Batista made the save.

Better Smackdown than usual.

Batista and Eddie beat The Ortons, with Eddie pinning Bob Orton after a Frog Splash in the main event dark match.

Oh man, The Boogeyman!? I gotta see this shit...

And wow, Paul London must've really pissed off Vince. I guess me refering to him as Ricky Steamboat (he looks quite a bit like him, except more white) was closer to home than I expected. :P

Next week London will come out in a lizard outfit and will breath fire. Smell the ratings!

And I think I actually have to tune in to see the Boogeyman. This sounds too stupid to be true.

London will come out as Baby 2005. Austin will bring back "Crapper 3:16" to complete the rehash.

I'm actually pumped for this show. I've heard TONS of good stuff about the Tolands, so I really want to see them as well. I'll take Orton/Eddie DQ or not as well.....

It damn well better. ...And as soon as he debuts, we have a new induct for WrestleCrap!